My upper lip has become the Unholy Trinity of Misery. Though I am not a religious person, I recognize evil when I see it. Allow me to share why my upper lip causes such misery. Let me introduce you to the concept of Ladystache: Definition of LADYSTACHE lād-ē-staSH noun 1: The appearance of hair above the upper lip of an individual who identifies as female. 2: A stripe of discolored skin, or a substance, on the upper lip of a

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Things are changing inside my body. I suspect it's that peri-menopause thing setting in.  Sort of like a special kind of global warming for women over 40. It started with hot flashes. Suddenly, out of nowhere, my body feels like it's on fire. I start sweating profusely. I grab the nearest piece of paper that I can turn into a fan. If I’m in the grocery store, I stick my head in the freezer compartment and get really familiar with

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During my annual gynecological exam my gynecologist let me know that I have a long vagina. He cheerfully made this announcement while inserting the speculum with the same finesse as Buffy the Vampire Slayer when she plants stakes in hearts. “Ah,” I replied. “Thanks.” So, I have a long vagina... I begin to wonder how long. Isn’t it supposed to be either wide or tight? I don’t know why, but the idea of having, at least what seems to be

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Boobs. Tits. Breasts. Jugs. Hooters. Whatever synonym you choose for reference, these fatty bulges made my adolescence an all-inclusive trip to HELL. Boobs receive a lot of attention in our society and sure, they can be tits fun, but only in the best of contexts. I developed early. Too early. When I was eight, I was forced to wear a bra. My mother decided that brutal honesty was the best route for building a healthy body image. Of course, being

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